Last Night I rode A llama through The Mall
Verse 1:
I went to bed like usual, just my dog and me
Ate some chili, popped a Tums, and turned on the TV
Next thing I know, I'm on a blimp with Elvis and King Kong
Sippin' root beer floats with Gandhi—boy, something's goin' wrong!
Then Oprah turned into a lizard and started to dance,
While I did the hokey pokey in polka-dotted pants!
Chorus:
Oh, my brain takes a vacation when I hit the sack,
Reality checks out and never comes back.
I don’t need no mushrooms or crystal ball—
'Cause last night I rode a llama through the mall!
Verse 2:
Dreamed I married a mermaid with a biker tattoo,
She served spaghetti tacos and sang like Betty Lou.
My grandma flew in on a UFO with fries,
Said, “Don’t trust penguins—they’re government spies!”
Then a walrus offered me a part-time job,
Selling moonshine popcorn to a mob of angry frogs!
Chorus:
Yeah, my brain writes comedies while I snore and sprawl,
Like Shakespeare mixed with Redneck Carnival.
Forget Freud—I’ve seen it all—
Like that time I rode a llama through the mall!
Verse 3:
Woke up in the morning, face stuck to my cat,
Had my sock on backwards and my pants like that.
Told my wife about the dream—she said, “You need help.”
But Dr. Phil was in it too, dressed up like an elf!
So I started a dream journal to track the nightly show—
But now it reads like Netflix met a rodeo!
Final Chorus:
Now my brain’s a circus with no curtain call,
Where chickens preach and jellybeans play ball.
If you ever feel sane—just give me a call,
'Cause last night...
Oh last night...
Yeah, last night I rode a llama through the mall!
Credits:
Lyrics and melody by Robert Jennings
Published by InnerSelf Publications
AI-assisted production and vocals
©2025 InnerSelf Publications. All Rights Reserved.
